Recent Dreams

Posted: August 6, 2014 in About Me, Random Thoughts
Tags: , , ,

I’ve dreamt of the past… Of someone I have loved with all my being.  The only person who made me feel like I can do anything, believe in my self and that I’m strong.  But somewhere along the way, I lost him.  I lost him when we’re supposed to be happy… He was taken away by Death, taken to make me realize that I don’t deserved to be happy…

I’ve dreamt of the now… Of the person I’m starting to fall for.  It was a good dream.  A dream meant to make the heart flutter and think of happy endings.  Sad thing, it’s just a dream.  The reality is far from it.

I’ve dreamt of the monster inside me… the darkness I have tried keeping inside.  In that dream, I’ve let it loose… wreaking havoc in my life.  I’ve seen it taking over, finally taking over its claim.  I felt the raw angst, the aggression, the disregard for anything good.  I’ve seen how she looked at me, how she thinks so little of me.  The monster laughing in triumph with me losing my last shards of sanity.

I’ve been bothered by these recent dreams.  They all occurred in the same night.  No amount of distraction can take them off my mind.  My lifeline’s been busy…  My angels have seemingly lost their wings.

And here I am, trying hard not to sleep at night, to keep them away… To keep my thoughts clear.

But I know, my efforts were all futile.

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